The Bachelor Women Tell All Recap: Courtney Robertson in the Crosshairs
One week from finale night, the ladies of The Bachelor are back for The Women Tell All special, the traditional penultimate episode of the ABC reality show’s season.
Typically, this installment is mostly filler. But this is not a typical season.
For the first time in BACHELOR HISTORY, one of the two finalists is going to be in the hot seat. With firebrand Courtney Robertson, they had to make an exception.
We know what The Bachelor spoilers say about the outcome next Monday, but what do the dismissed women have to say about her, and about Ben Flajnik?
Let’s break it all down in THG’s LIVE +/- recap!
Chris Harrison kicks this off. Rollin’ like a P-I-M-P as always. The man is the ultimate show-runner. Smooth, debonair, exuding raw sexiness. Pimp. Plus 20.
Where-are-they-now time-eating Bachelor reunion/STD cesspool montage! Minus 11.
Who are all these people? Randoms are better than Kasey Kahl, but still, Minus 8.
Ali Fedotowsky: Beautiful and stylish. Plus 10. Ed? Frank? Not so much. Minus 7.
Bachelor Pad 3 is gonna. Be. In. Sane. Plus 14.
Best-of-Season-16 montage. Most of these girls’ greatest hits involve calling Blakeley a stripper, and did we have to relive the Jamie kiss?! Minus 12.
This Samantha chick apparently took a Five Hour Energy, a Red Bull, a few shots of vodka and a line of coke before coming out on stage. Plus 10.
Who are the 3-4 people who clapped as Brittney said she left the show because she had “no attraction to Ben whatsoever”? Nicely played, audience. Plus 6.
Even Chris is cracking up at Samantha’s apparent insanity. Plus 4.
Poor Shawntel Newton is back. Again. She’ll never learn. Minus 10.
“WHO IS SHE?!” Didn’t get any less funny the second time. Plus 9.
Minus 12 for the thighs comments, though. And dumpster trash? We understand being a little on edge, but where do they find these people? Losers.
Looking good is the best revenge though, Shawntel. Respect. Plus 18. And Plus 5 more for Emily O’Brien jumping on Team Shawntel. Girl crush much?
Emily is totes the hottest rapping epidemiologist in all the land. Plus 10.
Slamming Ben for thinking with his junk and for the way he talked to her? Bashing Courtney for … well, everything? This is what the WTA is all about! Plus 19.
Forget Emily M. Emily O. for Bachelorette? Plus 14.
Nicki seems very sincere and legitimately heartbroken. Plus 6. And still has nice things to say about Ben! Plus 4, as that’s becoming a rarity nowadays.
Shocked not to get a rose? Guess Nicki didn’t read the spoilers. Or see Lindzi ride in on a horse. Or witness Ben’s sexual fascination with Courtney. Plus 9.
Ouch, nice shoulder pads, Kacie B. Wow. Minus 15.
Forced to relive the least graceful exit of all time on TV? Minus 8. At least somewhat redeeming herself with class and dignity in this interview with Chris? Plus 12.
Minus 10 for pretending the producers didn’t make her go to Switzerland. Yes, she flew all the way out there to seek closure after getting dumped on a reality show.
Someone just sent us this classic pic (Plus 20):
Plus 17 for the fact that even Kacie B. bashes the hell out of Courtney. And the fact that this Courtney trash talk compilation we found is 53 minutes long. 53.
We like Emily’s side pony tail. Screw you Court. Minus 5.
She really does make Blakeley look normal. Plus 3.
You know, Kacie B.’s dress totally looks like one of the items made on Project Runway. By a contestant who gets eliminated that week. Minus 11.
LOL, Samantha is defending Courtney saying “winning.” #Losing. Minus 7.
The audience sounds about ready to burn Courtney at the stake, and boy, she did not look pleased in that cut-away to her standing backstage. Plus 9.
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! Minus 100.
Blakeley just OWNED Courtney. Kill the Black Widow with kindness. Plus 30. Elyse sucks, however. Don’t be bitter just because you wish you were in her shoes.
There’s no sincerity in her voice as she apologizes, backpedals and tries to explain her actions. It’s as if she’s this cyborg, skinny-dipping seductress model. Minus 20.
Then again, Courtney’s probably thinking to herself “well, I’m sitting here in the final two and you’re not, so what the f–k do I care?” And she’s right. Plus 10.
Courtney says “to be honest” a lot. Whoa. Must mean she’s extra honest! Minus 6.
Honest or not, she is definitely braless. Flopping around in there. Minus 4.
Wow. The press has been hard on Courtney? Who’d have guessed? Plus 18. She must be really hating life these days. See above. Minus 136.
More straight up OWNAGE by Emily. Plus 32.
Did she say cared for Ben, past tense? Minus 10.
Wow. She seems legitimately stunned right now. This is awful/great TV. Plus 40. Wonder if the events of the past couple of months finally made her implode. We still don’t buy the selfless apology, but she’s taken aback?
If she does win, imagine how Ben felt watching this winter. Minus 15.
“Welcome to my nightmare.” – Ben. Spoken like a happy guy who has no regrets about his decisions throughout the season!!! Or not. Minus 20.
Who is the girl in the back row with bangs? Do they try to sneak some random in there just to see if we’re paying attention? If so, Plus 30.
Ben looks subdued, but not in a chill way. Like a checked out, counting the minutes until this nonsense is over and I can go back to the winery way. Minus 20.
Plus 25 for all the clips of wildlife disrupting the show.
Annnnnnd Minus 10 for the clips of Ben quirkiness.
Team. Lindzi. Plus 75.
EPISODE TOTAL: +24! SEASON TOTAL: -19!
Double THG poll time:
1. Courtney Robertson …
2. Who should Ben pick?
